Date: Sunday 13th September 1990
Mood 5.1 Vividness 7.6
1 – Record Breaker
I looked out the window towards Barbara’s house and I saw someone drinking out of a specimen bottle.
Then I was in the supermarket and there was a revolution going on there. I sent a woman soldier to take the leader hostage. I was at school, and I saw a girl I haven’t seen for ages, and I realised I loved her. Then I went out of class and down some stairs to a subway. There were some big bullies and I sat down because I didn’t want to pass, so I sat down and Jason Spatcher said I couldn’t run away all my life.
Then I was in a very large, old kind of pond, about 4/500 meters circumference. I walked on a piece of mud and there was a waterfall to my right (only small). I walked in the water knee deep and waded to the other side, even though it was a long way through a ?twig came out the water at me, then ?retreated. I got to the other side and stopped at a sign that ??? I thought was the finish, but a man told me it wasn’t, and to go round a bit. I did and then I saw the real finish sign. I thought now I’ll be in the Guinness Book of World records, then I thought, ‘No, I can’t because it’s esoteric, inside, and I can’t prove it.’
Interpretation
Not sure about the urine part or the revolution.
The girl I was in love with and not passing the bully’s show my two main mistakes in life to date.
The pool part is something inside, esoteric that I can’t prove, so it’s almost definitely astral Projection. The pool is either the unconscious of the astral place, probably the former me crossing it hopefully means success, not sure about the false end.
All this could easily be right because a long time ago, 3-4 years, I dreamt of a Bastet cat goddess statue in connection with astral projection, and now, without realising, I’ve bought one. Also I had a dream telling me knowledge of the four elements would open some kind of door and I’ve just done Earth, starting last night. I dreamt of a summary of my past this time because it probably means a new start.
Date: Sunday 23rd September 1990
Mood 2.3 Vividness 1.9
I was walking past a bookshelf and I looked at a book called how to get things right. I carried on walking and went into a toilet. I saw a woman crying hysterically and people trying in vain to help her. I took over and took her home with me. She lived in our garage. Ann came in to see what was happening, and I told her nothing, and she left.
Interpretation
Not sure about this at all.
Note: Above was a lucid dream attempt.
When I go to bed I give myself the command to wake up with the idea of falling back into the dream. I’ll have to see how that goes. Last night was the first attempt.
Date: Monday 24th September 1990
Mood 2.2 Vividness 2.1
Credit Card
I queued up in Sainsbury’s and bought a credit card. Then I was home and Phil and Yasmine came in. Phil asked me where my new job was. I showed him a Sainsbury’s bag and he understood. Then I was at a cash dispenser using my card, but the machine wasn’t working. I realised I could punch in any amount I wanted. Then I realised I was spelling the word wrong (which I’ve now forgotten).
Interpretation
This is almost certainly about my lucid dream attempts. The card shows that which I wish to obtain. The ?bed also shows what I want in the bag. The wrongly spelt word refers thus:- Before I go to bed each night I write down a command ?letting me wake up after my first dream, with the idea of continuing it with full consciousness.
Because in the dream my word was wrongly spelt, it probably means I was phrasing it wrong. Once in the dream I realised the R was missing. I knew I could have as much as I wanted. Also I think the command doesn’t work now because I’m having trouble with my sleeping pattern, therefore it could work from Thursday morning.
Date: Tuesday 25th September 1990
ASTRAL PROJECTION ATTEMPT
I’ve just been upstairs to do an astral projection attempt and I came VERY close.
I started about 3.30pm. Ann had gone to the hair dressers. I had been working on a book I am writing and researching about the elements. I lay down and spent about, just over a minute externalising the body of light. When I put myself into it, I first made a single affirmation, then moved in. I kept awareness of the body of light, then turned both eyes outwards simultaneously. I kept looking down the BOL to its feet and hands and moving them, then in front of me to the wall, then at my face. After a couple of minutes I felt my body lifting up and got disorientated. I felt VERY strong movement and I knew I was close.
I think this carried on for about a minute. Afterwards my body (physical) had gone tense with excitement, and I think this had brought me back. This attempt was easily the best I have ever had.
I was very tired at the time and this may have had something to do with it. Since the last new moon, on most attempts, my arms have felt very much that they were out of my body. So I have been lifting out a bit. I’ve got eight days to the full moon. So I think it will be interesting to see what will happen.
Date: Wednesday 26th September 1990
Astral Projection
I did it again early morning and it wasn’t as strong, but I had a pressing need to go toilet. The feelings were quite strong and different than usual and the change of perspective is much more real now. I lost my concentration through worrying about my poll tax summons. I did occasionally feel as though I was moving but soon lost thought. Apart from this so there is definite progress there. My dreams say so and now I’m sure it is coming true.
Date: Thursday 27th September 1990
Mood 5.2 Vividness 7.4
Big Wheel 4
I was just going upstairs and a letter came. I opened the door and there were different parcels. One was a massive six square foot picture. One was a Golden Dawn book, and one was GD tarot cards.
Then I was walking home along the Kettering Road and I realised the fair was here on the racecourse, with a massive fairground wheel. I went up close and had a look. I heard a woman tell her children that in a fairground you can learn to see the elements. I went over to another tent and ordered dinner which was a roast and I went to sit down. I saw a sign that said no smoking but a young boy started up. Then a young boy, who in the dream was my friend, told me to sit with him. He told me that UFOs were people being initiated but I didn’t believe him.
Interpretation. Big Wheel 4
The first bit about letters probably means I’ll actually get some because in waking life I’m waiting for their book. It may mean finding something out.
The wheel obviously shows the wheel of fortune. Not sure about the elementals. Perhaps it just shows a general occult theme. The tent shows the moment in my life each month feeling as though I’m a different person. I think/hope ordering food and waiting for it shows the substance about to come to me. The writing part shows me waiting for it. The smoking part is real. I was in a restaurant and a woman told me to stop. The UFO shows my initiation has taken place inside even though I didn’t recognise it.
Same day, fell asleep again upstairs.
5: Chocolate Dream
I had a job selling tickets [unreadable] then I went in a shop to buy some chocolate, but I didn’t dare get it because there were weird girls where it was. There was more chocolate on the counter and I thought about buying it, but it wasn’t exactly what I wanted so I went out.
I thought to myself that there’s another sweet shop only a few feet away so I’ll go there. I started and woke up before I got there.
Interpretation 5: Chocolate Dream
The ticket part shows the thing I most want, Astral Projection, the shop also shows the same desire, once again, the same day I dreamed of food. Last time I ordered it and waited for it. This time I went to a different shop to buy it. I’m not sure if this means I’ll get it or nowt. If I hadn’t woken up for the first time my food would have come, the second time I could have bought it in another shop. So it probably shows things to come.
Date: Same Day
ASTRAL PROJECTION
I just tried again and although I didn’t have the VERY strong lifting out feeling, I did feel complete movement a few times and my arms felt strongly as though they were turned the wrong way around. This may be because when I’m trying to feel my way into the body. I concentrated on the body’s arms and trying to clench the fists. That possibly lifted my arms south more than the rest of me. I think next time I’ll try somehow to feel the whole of my body.
Date: Friday 28th September 1990
Mood 3.1 Vividness 5.1
Lift 6
I went to a Japanese girl’s caravan and her sister came in and we all played together.
Then I was in a lift with loads of people. It wouldn’t close because the people went right out the door and I wouldn’t move. Then I got out and heard someone say I’d been stuck for 12 years.
Date: Saturday 29th September 1990
Mood 5.0 Vividness 7.6
Jungle Escape 7
I was reading my five year diary and saw it was made in 1929. I then went to the table and started reading about the occult in a book. I saw the tattvas and also the spheres of the Tree of Life with the shapes cut out according to their numbers, e.g., Yesod had nine sides. Then a punk girl came in after an Asian girl who were both followed by a family. So I called Ann and went upstairs.
Then I was in the Japanese Jungle and I was a soldier with other soldiers, and we had to get out.
We found a little murky river and all got in little boats and off we went. We were going along and were surrounded by floating leaves. Next time I looked we were all drifting on floating giant leaves. The vegetation was very dense.
Finally the foliage cleared and we were out in very wet fields of farmland. We looked over the walls that enclosed us and it was all soggy marshland for as far as I could see.
Then I saw a house with another house nearby. We went there, about three of us, but some Japanese soldiers came with a Japanese woman and took her to the house. We all hid desperately. We got up and went to the other house. It was the other woman’s children. They let us in and were really friendly. They gave me something to eat and some sandwiches for my friends. We left, and I gave the woman my moonstone and told her it would bring her dreams.
Interpretation. Jungle Escape 7
This dream comes on the day I’m going to make an independence talisman and I’m sure it’s talking about that.
The first bit is me researching exactly how to make it and showing it’s being made because I didn’t like the family I’m now with.
The bit in the jungle probably shows life is a sad jungle, but because I’m a soldier, I’m prepared to fight through it. The river gives a way out even though it’s difficult. The leaves show my talisman guiding me out (which is the best part of the dream). Emerging from the jungle shows progress. Looking over the wall shows me looking for a way out and finding one. Hiding could mean hiding either from Ann or from difficulties and the hospitality shows hopefully independence, and the present shows giving of self to the new situation. 1929 reduces to 3, the number of Binah, the sphere I’d work in.
Date: Sunday 30th September 1990
Mood 5.2 ok Vividness 7.1
Birth/Death 8
I was a waiter in a restaurant and someone (Ginger) asked me if a certain book about talismans worked and I told him I’d tried two already and they’d both worked.
Then I was with Brian and Mum and Brian was a farmer who had just beed ?unreadable. Some men rung up and asked me to ask him if he could help with their lambs being born.
Johnathan Pine was in my lounge and he stole a pen and Ann bought another. She wrote a letter to Geoff. It wrote too thick and she didn’t like it. I looked in a magazine and saw an advertisement for a dinosaur exhibition on 27th September, poll October and I decided to go.
Then I was walking down the Kettering Road and Jason went to apply for a sewing job, but I ?needed through a crack and saw he didn’t get it.
I carried on walking home with a girl crying on my shoulder and I realised I was wearing a sad tee-shirt which could make it worse.
Interpretation Birth/Death 8
The first part comes the night after I make my talisman, my second one, that could show they will work.
The farmer part shows their work in making a death of old, birth of new situation.
The letter probably shows me asking Geoff for an astral projection tape, which I asked him to get a minute ago, which he can do. Not sure about the dinosaur part or ?self, or the date. It’ll have to wait for the 28th though. I think it was in September. I think perhaps the house part means me getting insight into Jason. I didn’t know about the girl.
Date: Tuesday 2nd October 1990
Mood OKish Vividness 5.3
Help 9
I was in Geoff’s body and he was in mine.
I was then walking across a field with someone and was looking for help. My friend pointed to a bishop walking towards us and I asked him what I should do.
He directed me to a school. When I got there there was French graffiti all over the playground school with one English sentence which I can’t remember.
Then I was at home on the patio. I tried to get in the outhouse and sit down. Once in I realised wasps might get in so I tried to patch up the gaps in the door. When I realised I couldn’t I tried to use magick to keep them out. Then I got out the outhouse and sat on the patio. I had a glass of blue cloudy liquid. A wasp flew in there and disappeared to the bottom. All the liquid started bubbling and swirling around and then the wasp/bee drank it. All the liquid disappeared and the wasp grew/became fat with the extra volume of the liquid.
Interpretation Help 9
The night I dreamt this, I was worried about my poll tax summons to appear in court on Thursday. I’d been down to pay seven pounds of my one hundred and forty pounds bill. When I got there they said before I signed on, even though I wasn’t working, they considered me to be in full employment. Therefore I must pay the bill in full, or the bailiffs would come on Friday.
The dream first of all shows me looking for help. The school shows the whole thing is a learning process. The French messages show the confusing, but there is an overriding message.
Me in the outhouse shows me hiding away and not being able to, even with the help of magick. When I come out it shows the irritation will make me grow, even with a better awareness of life.
Date: Thursday 4th October 1990
Mood OKish 5.0 Vividness 4.1
Shopping 10
I went to a shop to buy some new boots. At the counter I saw they were holey and the man said I would have to get them re-soled. So I left them.
Then I was in the occult shop and I bought twenty pounds worth of parchment, put some photo frames on the counter and painted them.
Interpretation Shopping 10
This is very easy to do. The first part shows me being dissatisfied with my poll tax demand. The second says I’ll buy something of worth from the occult shop and that day I bought the book of formation.
Date: Friday 5th October 1990
Mood 5.7 Vividness 6.8
River Crossing 11
I was in the kitchen with Ann and Dion Fortune and Ann was mad, asking me what magickal wand I had made. She was frightened that it was too powerful, so she had called Dion Fortune to come and look at it. I got my fire wand and showed it to Mrs. Fortune and she approved. Then [unreadable] wasp in a glass of drink [Note: this last sentence is written in subscript].
Then I was going downtown with Jason and we were crossing the road. It was really snowy. I slipped and brought Jason down with me. We got up and crossed the road. Jason turned into Winston Churchill. We were going down some stairs and Winston had to sit down and I left him because he couldn’t go on any longer. I got to the bottom of the stairs and went out to a river. I crossed a rope bridge (just) and got to a hut in the river. Then I walked down a pontoon. At the bathroom an Indian girl was waiting for me and I was about to cross on a boat which she was going to swim in front and tow. Before I got in I stopped her and upon seeing how wide the river was, I asked her if it was safe.
Interpretation River Crossing 11
The first part in the kitchen shows the dream is connected to my occult life. The bit with the wasp shows learning from irritation once again except the liquid was white this time.
The road shows me falling for some ?unreadable and I bring Jason down with me. Perhaps it means when I first met him I got him into the occult without knowing much about it. Then we both crossed a road. I found a Golden Dawn book, and he found shamanism. Then he turned into Winston Churchill, meaning he became a stubborn old man. When it was time to go down, possibly into the mind, but it must be better because it was so sunny at the bottom. He’d had enough and I’ll have to leave him behind.
I got to the river and crossed to new experience and I’ll meet a more ?esoteric part of myself or the universe in the guise of the mystical Indian woman. This mystical ‘thing’ will cross me over a river to a new foreign ?esoteric/exotic life experience and I may hesitate.
Date: Sunday 7th October 1990
Mood 5.2 Vividness [unstated]
Jew 12
I was in a Jewish hall writing a book with a friend. I drew a picture of her (Annette Baker).
Then I looked over a lake and saw people using. One man had a line with many different baits on it and he showed me.
Then I was hiding behind a police car with a friend and the police were looking for me. I gave myself up.
Interpretation Jew 12
The bit in the Jewish place shows writing a book and expressing myself. The lake shows the possibility for deep insights to come through.
The police shows doing what’s right.
Date: Tuesday 8th October 1990
Mood 5.3 Vividness 7.4
Walker 13
I was in a car with Mum driving. She was going to the airport to pick up Geoff’s friend who in real life is in America looking for a tape I want to help me Astrally project. She dropped me off at a forest and said she’d come back when she got it/him. I walked into the trees and went a little way, then turned to come back on the road. On the way I saw a ball balanced on a bush. I had thrown there earlier, like a few days ago. Then I was back on the road. I was at a crossroads. To my left a woman went before me ?a man went. I realised whenever someone went too far the forest rangers would come and pick them up. I saw between the two roads there was a very steep hill with an old iron fence by it covered with trees. [Note: there’s a hand drawn map here].
I used the fence to pull myself up. It was very steep indeed. When I got to the top after almost falling a couple of times I was VERY high, on a kind of bridge, which went over the water. A voice inside told me to get down I could go the way I came, jump on the ground or jump in the river. I looked down and didn’t dare do either. Then I became aware of my body in bed, while still seeing myself on the bridge. I realised I was dreaming and couldn’t be hurt because my body was safely in bed at home. I thought what I should do and decided to open my eyes and wake up, which I did.
Interpretation Bridge 13
The first part shows next Sunday. Geoff’s friend should be back with my tape about astral projection. Mother leaves me in a forest of my unconscious where I go into it, then have to come out which I think, including the ball at the top of the bush, is my goal and awareness of it.
Then I come to a crossroads where I had to make a choice. I decided to pick the hard route of Astral projection. After a period of hard work I got to the bridge between the conscious and the unconscious. There I realised nothing can hurt me in my inner forest because I am also at home in bed. It will be interesting to see if Geoff’s friend can find the tape.
Date: Wednesday 9th October 1990
Mood 4.5 (HEADACHE) Vividness 4.3
Spirit 14
I saw a dead wasp.
Then I went in the occult shop and saw my slimming drink, but it wasn’t the same make as I like so I didn’t buy it.
Then I went to a spiritualist meeting. There was a computer on the platform. A dead person was speaking to relatives through the computer. A woman gave me a brass bowl to look after until next time I came.
Then I was somewhere and I threw a knife into the brass bowl.
Then I was in a cafe and Darren remarked on my bowl having holes in it.
Interpretation Spirit 14
Not sure, perhaps I’ll see through something.
Date: Saturday 12th October 1990
Astral Projection
I was almost lifted out again. Not as much as last time. Also, I was on my own again like last time. Ann was next door. I think I’ve got the trick of feeling my way into the body now. Geoff says my tape won’t be here until next Saturday now. I wonder what that means (the dream?).
Same day. Dream
Ear Cleaner 15
I was at school in a classroom being taught by a giant cotton ?tool stick that you usually clean your ears with. I looked at it seething with anger. I got up and walked towards it. It ran off out the classroom. I went to go home but as I left the classroom my legs turned heavy and I couldn’t walk. I realised I was dreaming and flew out the school and circled it in the air.
Interpretation 15
It means I didn’t want to listen at school. Almost LUCID.
Date: Monday 14th October 1990
Mood bad 1.2 (row) Vividness 3.4
Fog Alley 16
I was walking down the alley with Jason and putting cigarette packets on the floor at the back of each door. When I got home John Lovette was there and I had a row with Ann.
Interpretation Fog Alley 16
I’d had a massive row with Ann before I went to bed. The cigarette shows because I smoke and she buys them. I find it difficult to leave. John at home shows the situation has occult significance.
Same day: Astral Projection
I think I’ve found a new way of trying. Once in the body of light, I feel my feet up to my head, slightly moving the ???. My way in. Then look through my eyes in the hope they’ll open. I did this today for five times. I’ll carry on increasing by five each day.
Date: Thursday 17th October 1990
Mood OK 5.2 Vividness 5.3
Shark Attack 17
I was on a ship/submarine and a shark came next to the boat. I pressed a bomb and blew it up. Then I was on deck and I pressed a button that let all the guns out and the captain told me off.
Interpretation Shark Attack 17
I think I’ll get rid of something in my subconscious and another part of me won’t like the ?defences.
Date: Friday 26th October 1990
Mood OK 5.2 Vividness 6.7
Years Ago 18
I had a kind of market stall with canvas over it and it resembled a tent. I was eating my dinner while reading a cookbook. Then I hung stolen cocktails on a line to sell them. Two people who were running the stall with me came back and said the police were coming, so I hid the cocktails. The police came and I got done. I looked out and it was pouring with rain. I saw my brother who in the dream ran away years ago. I sat and looked at my pentacle and some of the paint had chipped off. I told Geoff he was never generous.
Interpretation Years Ago 18
This shows mum + dad used to have a market stall. As bad as it was it was a learning experience. When I looked at the pentacle, I realised it looked better without paint. So it didn’t bother me. This shows getting rid of stuff I don’t need.
You’re right, sorry about that! The HTML I produced started from the “Help 9” entry which was already in the previous batch. Let me deliver just the new entries from this patch only, starting from **Same Day. Astral Projection.** (the one that follows Help 9).
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Same Day. Astral Projection.
I’m still trying as usual. I’ve got a new book that basically says the same as others, except if you do it when you’re falling asleep you’ll go into the hypnogogic period, then wake up in the body of light. My sleeping patterns have been out of whack. I sign on on Monday, so I’ll be sleeping normally Tuesday night/Wednesday morning and I’ll start trying then.
Geoff’s friend came back from the States and couldn’t find the tape. So in the dream Mum went off and didn’t come back, then I realised I was free. So hopefully it means I’ll do it without it (Dream Walker 13)
Date: Sunday 28th October 1990
Mood OK 5.1 Vividness 4.8
Hospital 19
I was in hospital and I saw a nurse chucking a chemical down the sink. Another nurse came in and shouted at her because she wasn’t supposed to.
Then I was at school with other kids and I didn’t like the ?system, so I told them to start a revolution. I was naked so I told them to wait while I put some clothes on, even though I wasn’t embarrassed.
Interpretation. Hospital 19.
I think it just goes back to me rebelling at school I had to stay in hospital once and when I got out I was never the same. Me being naked shows it felt natural for me at the time.
Date: Tuesday 30th October 1990
Mood OK 4.7 Vividness 3.7
Little Aliens 20.
I was in the garage and there were all sorts of little lights around me. I realised they were UFO’s and they didn’t necessarily have to be big to be aliens.
Interpretation Little Aliens 20
Date: Wednesday 31st October 1990 (Halloween!)
Mood OK 5.1 Vividness 5.6
In Charge 21
I pricked myself with a needle and wondered if I’d caught aids.
Then I was a director making a film. I was supposed to know what I was doing and everyone assumed I did, but I was supposed to plug in some leads, and I didn’t know where they went.
Then in the same place I was suddenly a trainee doctor and I had to give an injection. I went to get the drugs which was a bottle of ear drops and the man charged me ten pounds. I was really mad. Then when I paid the ten pounds, I was at home and the money ?had placed a a bet for me. I looked at my betting slip and the horses name was Pay Toll, it was four to one and I thought I may pay in twenty pounds (somehow).
Interpretation In Charge 21
Making the film is life in general, my own ?time. People expect me to know what to do when I don’t. The doctor is responsibility, and the injection of drugs is paying something I don’t want to. Pay toll means poll tax. The slip means it (for some reason) was better paid.
Same Day. Astral Projection.
I’ve had trouble with my sleeping pattern again but I think I’m OK now. I’ll try my sleep idea hopefully from tonight.
Date: Monday November 5th 1990 (fireworks night).
Mood OK 5.3 Vividness 7.8
Away from School 22
I was back at Mum’s house and I said hallo to Brian. They both went out and I walked around. I looked in the fridge and there was lots of food there but it wasn’t for me. It was in plastic bags ready for a party. Then I went outside into the dark. It slid downhill and bumped into a car but it didn’t damage it. I had to push it up. The handbrake didn’t work.
Then I was back at school in the gym. I was running round. I sat with Christopher, then John McCork, Harvey Wigfall sat opposite us. He gave John a piece of paper with ?Schiller bow in it and The Schiller was a bundle of money, they used it instead of currency. It was illegal. Me and Harvey left and I told him about the time a girl wanted me and I said no. As I left the doorway, I looked in a catalogue that contained products, tapes and the likes, to help you lucid dream. We went out and met Carl Brant. He was working as a traffic warden and I was surprised. They asked me if I wanted to hang about with them I hesitated because I had bought some books to work on my own book that I’m writing, but I did. We went and sat in the park, and Harvey used the Schiller note to buy us all a hamburger.
Then I woke up and wrote my dream down, then I woke up for real and really wrote it down.
Interpretation Away From School 22
The bit at Mum’s house shows her energy was directed to other people because the food wasn’t for me. The car going back and crashing shows a nervous breakdown and me slowly ?clawing my way back.
Being at school probably shows just that and the counterfeit money probably shows I felt cheated of the time I was there. I told him about the girl which I spurned, which is true and it was as I was leaving reading a catalogue of the occult/lucid dreaming meaning I chose mystical experience instead of the girl. My surprise at Carl probably meant surprise at how wasted and dead most of the people I was at school with seem to me now. We hung about and Harvey bought hamburgers with the counterfeit money I got when at school, meaning things I missed out on at school pays dividends. I then had a false awakening, showing mystical experience.
Date: Tuesday November 6th 1990
Mood OK 5.2 Vividness 6.1
Fishing 23
I was walking along a beach and I got into the water. My friends enclosed a net around me. I got some frogs spawn and dropped it in the water. There were big fish and little fish. The little fish came up for the bait and I put them in a separate tank.
Before this I was at school and a girl wanted me but I didn’t want her to see me because I was unshaven. I looked on the blackboard and it was covered with figures called Ballistic voodoo. My friend told me there was 72 figures/squares, one for each tarot card.
Interpretation – Fishing 23
The fish bit means acquiring something because I was glad when I caught them.
The bit in school is the same girl as yesterday. I see her sometimes but hid because I look so weird. This is what happened here. I looked at the board and my interest was again in Kabbalistic things.
Date: Wednesday November 7th 1990
Mood: OK 5.2 Vividness 8.8
LUCID DREAM
I first DREAMT I woke up and heard someone downstairs in the kitchen. Then I realised I was dreaming. I sat up and thought I was awake, then I thought this was a false awakening. I sat up again, then again, then realised I was still dreaming. I rose in the air and landed by the door. Then I rose again back in my body, very good.
Date: Friday 9th November 1990.
Mood OK 5.1 Vividness 4.9
[unreadable] 25
I was standing at a bus stop and the police arrested someone. They took me as well accidentally and as they drove off I was made to stick my arm out of the window.
Interpretation 25 Arrested
Repeat of something I saw on television.
Date: Saturday 10th November 1990
Mood 5.3 Vividness 5.0
Fireworks 26
I was on a beach and there was a shark in the water. I went up on a massive pier/jetty that went about a mile out in the water and two hundred feet in the air. When I got to the end I jumped in and swam back.
I was at home and it was fireworks night. Geoff had all the lights on so I turned them off. Geoff went to a party.
Me and Gary Wearing were out and looking for somewhere to stay. He ?[unreadable] a tent but we didn’t stay there.
Then he tried to run away for a joke and I found him. Then we went to watch American football.
Interpretation Fireworks 26
The first bit shows going into some kind of danger voluntarily. The second bit shows Geoff gets on my nerves.
Don’t know about the last bit.
Note: Before I went to bed I was in the lounge and I told myself to wake up there, but I fell asleep before I could project properly. I’ll have to try again, but soon I must change my sleeping pattern because I’m signing on again.
Date: Sunday 13th November 1990
Mood 4.5 Vividness 0.5
LUCID DREAM 27
I can’t remember what I dreamt last night but I definitely asked myself if I was dreaming.
Date: Tuesday 20th November 1990
Mood OK 5.0 Vividness 3.7
I was in school following everybody in a bustle through the corridors. Then I broke away with two others. We went down into a cellar and there I looked in a box. I saw a game that worked, two that didn’t and a calculator that didn’t have a percentage button. The game that did work had little men that you had to move up a mountain. Then a teacher came in and was mad because I wasn’t supposed to be there. They took me to the headmaster, and he was drawing out a certificate for something when his pen blotted all over it and he screwed it up.
Interpretation Paperback writer 28
The school bit shows ordinary life. I go the the cellar means at the moment I’ve broken away and am writing a book to let people better themselves, hence the game where people go up. I’m using Geoff’s calculator to add up the words and it doesn’t have a percentage key. The headmaster is probably a publisher. If I get a letter of acceptance I’m going to put it in some kind of scrap book and I don’t know what the blot means.
Date: Thursday 22nd November 1990
Mood 4.3 Vividness 7.2
?Sumo Girls ?29
I was at home and Geoff’s friend tipped a load of rubbish onto the floor and said he was an art student and he had to sort something out of all the rubbish. Geoff + him left after telling me to do it for him. I went outside and walked downtown. As I was near Nostaligia (a shop) I saw a man tell his daughter he said to come here to look at the cemetery and he was going to show her now. When I got near the occult shop I saw Kevin Richards and Niel ‘o’ Dell (school friends). I asked if they were on drugs because I was a doctor and they told me they were just drunk. We then all decided to spend the day together. We went in a shop that was called Japanese Girl track sumo wrestling or something. We went in and all paid three pounds for tickets. Niel got one green one and me and Kevin got two black ones. We went in and there was a sofa with three/four girls on. One laughed and looked embarrassed. She said to the sumo track bit was a cover and it really meant we’d paid to make love on the tracks. Outside was a railway. Neil looked out, turned and said,
“Oh Shit, there’s another one out here painting the track green!” I laughed and when I woke up I was still laughing.
Date: 4th December 1990
Mood OK 4.6 Vividness 5.4
Ice cream 30
I was out with a group of people and we were going parachuting. An Asian man I was with had ordered some food and another Asian man bought some ice cream. The one who ordered it didn’t have enough money and the Asian man no. 2 said he’s ten times as useless as he once was. I started swallowing the ten-pence pieces.
Interpretation Ice Cream 30
I’ve just finished a manuscript and I’m sending off ten copies + letters so it means I’m taking in the experience which I value. Parachute shows taking the plunge.
Date: Friday 14th December 1990
Mood OK 4.9 Vividness 7.4
Winds of Change 31
I got a load of parcels in the lounge and opened one and it was a rejection letter, but I carried on knowing I had so many that somewhere someone must be accepting it (my book).
Then I was out looking around shops and a young couple including Mark Kitchener (friend) asked me where the kitchen shop was (play on words). I showed him.
Then I was walking down an alley, and there were lots of doors/garages etc. When I got to the bottom I realised I was lost. A boy who sometimes turned into a dog (Dane Woodward – friend – Great dane?) showed me up another alley. It had less doors and it was now nighttime. People kept walking towards me and I shone a torch in their faces. I got back home, and it was day. I decided to give Dane some money for helping me. I saw my uncle (dead) trying to tow my car out the garage. He said he was a lot better off without me and wanted me to move out. I went in the house and Dane followed. Yasmine was there. I went to my bedroom and lay down.
Interpretation Winds of Change 31
The first bit is just real. I was looking through letters for my book reply (I’ve written + sent one off). I was sure I’d get one published. In real life I’d hoping I do hope it’s an optimistic note.
The next bit has two plays on words, looking around for a kitchen shows me looking for somewhere to live. Going down an alley shows I was/am going the wrong way and a friend will lead me out (Jay). The torch bit shows not being afraid to face frightening things. When I was using it, it gave me a sense of power. Getting chucked out is because Ann said I’d in for a shock after Christmas, maybe it means I’ll be told to leave. Very nasty. The house had all the people in I didn’t want. Perhaps I’ll want to go, possibly with book money, or is that jumping ahead?
Date: Wednesday 19th December 1990
Mood OKish 5.0 Vividness 4.9
Ice School 32
I was going to Jay’s house and I saw a group of people listening to a teacher. I sat down on a block of ice, but kept sliding off. A woman sat down and started telling me about ten something.
Interpretation Ice School 32
Before I had this dream I was reading about the Kabbalah so the ten something is the ten spheres. Why the ice? I don’t know.
Date: December 25th 1990 (Christmas).
Mood Low 3.2 Vividness 9.1
LUCID DREAM * 33
I was asleep on bed when I suddenly could see the ceiling, like I had holes cut into my eyelids. I imagined the ceiling getting nearer and nearer and I rose up out of my body. There was a really weird feeling over my physical body as I rose up. Once I was out I thought I won’t go far. This first time I’ll just go and see Geoff. I spun round and re-entered my body, knowing I can gradually increase the distances.
Then I was walking at the bottom of Bridge street and someone asked me the way to the market.
Then I was in the occult shop buying a load of jewellery, and someone asked me how much the dog collars were.
Interpretation Lucid Dream 33
The bit not lucid shows me starting to live [unreadable] life in the light of occult knowledge. The lucid dream comes when tomorrow I am going to start specific dream yoga to inspire lucid dreams.
Date: Tuesday 1st January 1991
Last night was around the third night that I’ve been doing my lucid dreaming exercises. Once (the first) I was disturbed but every time I’ve done it I’ve not remembered my dreams. It may just be a phase. Last night I think I was in America with some kind of couple who were being divorced. I should be on the last exercise by mid Feb, so I should know by then.
The exercises for clairvoyance are going VERY well. I’m seeing many things very clearly now and I can believe it when they come true. I’m not sure what will happen when the moon wanes.
I did a ritual last night to help me get my book published and I’ll look forward to that.
Date: Jan 2nd 1991
Mood 4.7 Vividness 7.2 (RESULT)
I was at a restaurant dining with a family and I was eating a dish that consisted of ash called lotus flower.
Then I cooked something in the microwave and when I read the pack I saw you were supposed to put your own topping on.
Then I was in a German prisoner of war camp and there were three rows of three boxes. English soldiers jumped out and beat the Nazis. One of them looked at me and shouted “That’s it!”
I went downtown and into a sweetshop to buy sweets to eat in the cinema. I couldn’t make up my mind. When I got back Barbara came round and asked me to go to the shops to buy her a choker. I asked Spatcher to go for me. We went outside and it was snowing. She ended up sending someone else anyway. (When we’d first come back from town the curtain was drawn and we felt depressed and that made it better. We’d played a game. It had made Darren feel worse, but Spatcher, better). We then went to Barbara’s house who was mad that I didn’t go to town for her choker but when I explained something to her she apologised and said that it would be OK.
Interpretation Advice 34
The first part refers to the exercise which I’ve been doing before I fall asleep which will hopefully cause me to become lucid. The ash is experience and lotus is another name for Chakra. The family I was with was Chinese and the exercise is Tibetan.
Cooking is a way we transform ourselves, and I have to put my own topping on, means I must ultimately do it myself.
The 3×3 rows in the camp, I think, are calculator keys, the prison is my home. I use my calculator to work out how much I need to move out. When the man shouts this is it, it could mean move out now – or it could be saying I’m dreaming.
The sweetshop and AGAIN choker show I want lucid dreaming. Having to go and get it prob. Shows I don’t want to do it myself. Explaining it shows (I think) I’m doing it right.
Above is the first dream I’ve remembered since starting the exercise.
Date: Thursday 3rd January 1991
Mood Lowish 4.7 Vividness 4.3
Advocard 35
I was in the lounge making cocktails in bottles to sell to people and the colour was a little dark.
Interpretation Advocard 35
I still had some advocaat left in my bedroom after Christmas so I cleaned it out. I should think this is what the dream meant.
Date: Friday 4th January 1991
Mood OK 5.1 Vividness 6.1
School 36
I was in the kitchen and Geoff’s friends came round and a light came on. I urinated in a tray.
I was then at a room talking on the phone about a job at a printshop. A woman hung up on me.
Then I was in the library. I saw a girl called Jane and Annabel was near me.
Interpretation School 36
In my bedroom I’ve got a tray full of water which I burnt a candle in and I’ve forgot to empty it so the first part warns me about that.
The next bit is like when I sign on they may ask me what I’ve been doing to find work, this may be a warning.
The school part is probably reminising
Date: Saturday 5th January 1991
Mood normal 5.0 Vividness 5.2
Celtic Clock 37
I got a load of presents. I opened them up and one was a Celtic alarm clock.
Interpretation Celtic Clock 37
Don’t know. Yes I do. This Christmas was so boring I’m going to celebrate Celtic New year etc. This dream shows last Christmas was my last Christmas.
Date: Saturday 12th January 1991
Mood OKish 4.9 Vividness 7.4
Detective 38
I was in the Grosvenor with Mum and she remarked on how happy and confident I seemed. A girl came up and told me there was a phone call from America for me. When I got to the phone it was someone who had taken a hostage. I was a detective. I then drank two advocards and something to eat. Someone had tipped wine in my advocard so I didn’t drink it. I then had a flat pint of bitter and a pack of bacon crisps. The bitter was in someone else’s dirty glass. I then saw Simon with a ten pound note with silver glitter around the edge and I wondered if he was the kidnapper. Then I found out that the kidnap affair had been a joke. A woman was mad because she’d hit a dog that she’d thought had done it.
Interpretation Detective 38
This refers to the party that I had over Christmas. The hostage part means I was pushed into it without really wanting it. I drank advocard but in reality I stopped and drank Jay’s beer after he spiked it I’m not sure about Simon. I wasn’t nice to him and the dog bit it’s probably guilt feelings.
Date: Saturday 19th January 1991
Mood Hmmm 4.2 Vividness 3.8
Armadel 39
I was in the market looking for a Grimoire of Armadel, then I was in the occult shop and I saw he had a whole Grimoire section.
Interpretation 39
I am actually looking for this book. Maybe it means I’ll find it in the occult shop? There actually is a whole Grimoire section in real life.
Date: Sunday 20th January 1991
Mood 4.3 Vividness 7.9
LUCID DREAM 40 *
I had a child by a girl called Anna who moved to Russia. I was going to ring her to see her but then I decided it wasn’t worth it.
I was in bed in the kitchen looking down the garden. I started saying, when I dream I’ll be aware that I’m dreaming. Then I asked myself if I was dreaming and I decided I probably was. I tried to rise to the air. I got up about five feet, slumped back and woke up.
Interpretation LUCID 40
I should think the first bit is about Annabel Sheeler.
With my lucid dreaming exercises I have to tell myself I’ll dream I’ll realise that I’m dreaming, then energised the chakras. I think this is the second time I’ve asked myself but the first time I said no. Tuesday I start the last part of the exercise, so I’ll look forward to what happens!