[Note: this short book was typed directly by myself from the original]
Plain red book (small)
Inside cover in blue biro:
Book cataloguing eventual successful attempt at Crowley’s will development.
Next page has two blue pieces of tape in the shape of a cross (possibly medical plasters) and a Magickal code name at the top.
The same word occurs on the next page with a universal hexagram. Then the words: Lion, unicorn, ox – and then my legal name.
Then there is something that appears to be a Magickal vow written in enchian script. It has a picture at the top, possibly of a Magickal wand. Then Frater [Magickal code name occurs here] – then my legal signature.
The next page has three more vows (or something) each one signed with my legal signature. One of them is in Theban script.
The next page has one more in enochian script, with the English initials M.A.B.S.
Format
Things doing + when smoke.
Amount of will lapses recorded daily.
Progress with Mabs recorded daily.
Meditate lapses recorded daily.
Food recorded daily.
Things done ticked off.
Date: Friday 18th Oct 1991
Doing [underlined] [My legal signature (at the time) appears here]
1/ Work. [Ticked]
2/ Ring college [Ticked].
3/ Bank [Ticked].
1 cigar in B.H.S. [Ticked]
4/ Send Rapid Results [Ticked]
5/ Sort ring out [Ticked].
6/ Finish W.B.
7/ Meditate [Ticked]
8/ L.B.R.P. 1 before bed
9/ biorythmn [Ticked] this occurs to the right of number six]
–X–
Results:-
Missed 5 Missed W.B. Smoked five cigars. 4 Yeses completely missed. P Missed ring. Ate food + sugar.
Terrible: FAILED. CUT 12
(didn’t count on meditating).
Dream O.K.
Date: Saturday 19th Oct
1 cigar
Finish W.B.
Sort ting out.
Meditate [Ticked] Biorythmn [Ticked]
L.B.R.P. [Ticked] 1 article/notes.
Sort Novel.
Aim 3/4 cigars.
Post letter.
Count Meditate (II) done. [Note: above the (II) there is a smear of blood].
–X–
Awful again. O P. Not done. 1.
6 cigars. Dreaming O.K.
4 cuts. 1 Chest. [Note: a smear of blood beside this word].
Date Sunday 20th October
Impractical.
1 Yes. No PS. 6 cigars.
Hypnogogic imagery. 3 cuts.
(1 Chest done)
Date: Monday 21st October 1991
Lapsed until:-
Date: Friday 8th November 1991.
Yes. The Letter P except please. Allowed if invalidated by crossed fingers.
[My legal signature here]
10 in deficit/retrospect.
Tuesday 12th November 1991.
Absolutely nothing done. Starting again. 10 owed now. Tomorrow, only food outside, no yesP except please unless crossed fingers.
[Note: my legal signature and a smear of blood occur here]
2 pts bitter
4 teacakes
1 Lg. M=M’s
1 health drink
?coffee
M&M’s [crossed out] at home 1.
6 will slips. 1+7=7
7 cuts. [Note: smear of blood here].
Date: Wednesday 13th Nov 91.
Same again.
Date: Sunday 17th Nov. 91.
Slipped slightly. Over two days20 (?2 each) then completely lost.
20 cuts. LIttle work done. {Unreadable, possibly ‘R’] start doing lists now
[Note: a smear of blood appears here]
Finish W.B.
Finish English.
Finish Letters. [Ticked]
Finish Tape.
Could do tape on and off in-between writing this week. I must push to get top 3 finished.
write Mon/Tues.
Cound one for band failure.
Date: Wednesday 20th Nov.
20 done belatedly.
Same tasks.
Sleep band. ?aware of taking off.
One separate cut in morning if not done properly, to be recorded below.
[Note: a smear of blood occurs here].
10 slips wed
5 Thurs
1 dream slip
16 cuts
[Note: Two distinct smears of blood occur here].
From now on, one band is on at night (up till then will be held). Mind isn’t allowed to wander and must be continually visualizing. With each wander there will be a silent count with separate cuts as necessary in the morning. Dream, if fnot but M.A.B.S. achievedd.
Straight out.
[Magickal code and my legal signature occur here].
Friday 22 November 1991
Stone forgotten (after tape).
Sleep now [down arrow here].
Dream, I ? [Unreadable] visa
Saturday 23rd November 1991
AT home. Stone not used. No proper Viz. Hazy dram. So speech monitored.
1 bad cut, speech + dream together.
[Note: blood smeared here, a larger amount in four seperate swipes].
Really push today [underlined]
2 bands – 1 on clock
2 attempts 2 possible cuts
Visualised both attempts
1st stage on both.
Not bad.
Store on Monday when I’m out at college.
1 CUT
[Smear of blood here].
Tomorrow – [Magickal name and legal signature here].
Date: Friday 6th December 91.
Missed up until today. 1 bad.
[Note: two large vertical smears of blood here].
As usual [My legal name here]
Date: MOnday 9th Dec. 91.
Missed ?Propnow
[Smear of blood here]
Today.
3 Done at collage.
[Small smear of blood here].
Dream not done.
Date: Tuesday 10th December 1991
1 dream
5 voice
[Two smears of blood here]
Date: WEdnesday 11th DEc 1991
6 to evening
1 Ann in
1 Dream
1 Health Drink
1 beans
6 Toasts
Nutella (small amount)
Non-lucid dream – 1
I mind – 1
10 cuts.
[Large smear of blood here]
Date: Thursday 12th Dec. 1991
Slip
Date: SAturday 14th Dec
20 mins up till now
[Large area of multiple blood smears here].
Date: Wednesday 18th Dec 91.
10 retrospectively.
[Various smears of blood here].
DEFINITELY STARTING SLEEP NOW, OR SEVERE CUTS
[My legal signature here].
Date: Jan 7th 1991 [?]
Meditating progressively worse past 3 days. REcord all + food from now on.
[My legal signature here].